THE EX-GOOD GIRL PODCAST

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

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Sara Bybee Fisk 1/15/25 Sara Bybee Fisk 1/15/25

Episode 97 - Stop People Pleasing: Current Members Share!

I want every woman to have the ability to create a life of her choosing, filled with the freedom to embrace her desires. I’ve worked hard to create a program that helps women achieve this, but the real magic of my Stop People Pleasing program comes from the women themselves who are willing to take risks, expand their capacity for feeling uncomfortable, and develop the skills needed to live authentically without the weight of constantly pleasing others. In this episode, I’m so grateful to be joined by four amazing women from my program–Allyssya, Sara, Stephanie, and Susan–who share their journeys with people pleasing. You'll hear about the changes they have made in their daily lives and in how they see themselves. Here’s what we cover:

How a group program provides encouragement from other women on the same path
Why trust in yourself is crucial to turn your focus to your own desires
How people pleasing has a cost, and you often pay for it with your peace and happiness
Examples of which areas in life people-pleasing tendencies are most common
Why coaching provides you with the freedom to implement what you've learned whenever the time is right for you
How to start living a life you created instead of living a life someone chose for you when you stop people pleasing

I can't wait for you to listen!

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 1/8/25 Sara Bybee Fisk 1/8/25

Episode 96 - What to Do When You Mess Up

Mistakes are a part of life–we all make them, whether it’s with ourselves, with others, or in pursuit of our goals. Even as we grow emotionally and strive for greater self-connection, our inner critical voice often shames us for every misstep. In this episode, I explore why self-compassion is key when we mess up, and how leaving self-criticism behind is essential to lasting growth. Here’s what I cover:

Examples that illustrate the way we were conditioned to fear making mistakes and the lasting impact this has
How to address the parts of yourself that are triggered when you mess up—the critic and the part that feels like you are in trouble—with compassion so you can move forward in a healthy way
Why caring for those parts allows us to separate ourselves from the mistakes we make
Sentences to say when you mess that preserve your self-respect and the sincerity of your apology
How people pleasers often conflate their self-worth with their actions, but you deserve to make a mistake and recover from it
Four questions to ask after you make a mistake to inspire a more loving response from yourself

I can't wait for you to listen.

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 1/1/25 Sara Bybee Fisk 1/1/25

Episode 95 - How To Set Goals That Actually Work with Goli Kalkhoran

I am so grateful to have a secure relationship with my husband, but it wasn’t always that way. Earlier in our relationship, I was terrified of being left by him, and I built myself an armor of hyper independence and dishonesty. I pretended to be ways I wasn’t to stay safe and “belong” with him. This lack of safety and insecurity in our relationship, I eventually realized, existed because I wasn’t safe with myself, and it wasn’t until I learned to create that safety with me that I could start to create safety in our relationship. When I did learn to become secure in myself, I was able to see more clearly what needed to change in our marriage, and I had the strength to ask for that change. In this episode, I talk about how I learned to create security with myself and how from there, I began creating security in my marriage and all my relationships. For those of you who are, like I was, feeling stuck in a painful relationship, I hope this episode will give you some clues into your own process of creating security in yourself first and in your relationships second. I can’t wait for you to listen, and I’d love to hear your thoughts when you do.

Find Sara here:

sarafisk.coach

instagram.com/sarafiskcoach

facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching

tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

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Sara Bybee Fisk 12/25/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 12/25/24

Episode 94 - We Are Thinking About Time All Wrong with Vikki Yaffe

When we don’t get to cross something off of our to-do list, we often blame ourselves for poor time management. However, the founder and creator of the Time Hacker Method, Vikki Yaffe, joins me today to offer the perspective that the problem is not us, but the mindset about time we’ve been taught to have. Vikki teaches people the skills to collaborate with time more flexibly, and I’m so grateful to have her on the podcast to share tips and tools to stop feeling shame around time and trust ourselves instead. Here’s what we cover:

How good girl rules overlap with myths about time management
The downfalls of the systems, norms, and tools that we have been taught that are supposed to help us with our time
How the false truths we were taught about time stem from exploitation
When we try to manipulate time by overscheduling ourselves, it prevents collaboration with time and a relationship with ourselves
An example of what it looks like when someone is caught up in the misunderstanding of time
Why your brain is the most effective tool to make lasting change with your time

I can't wait for you to listen.

Find Vikki here:

https://www.timehackers.xyz/

https://www.timehackers.xyz/guide

https://www.instagram.com/vikkiyaffe/

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 12/18/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 12/18/24

Episode 93 - How To Get Out of the Planning Trap with Priyanka Venugopal

“I just need a really good plan,” is a phrase that offers overachievers a sense of security, but the cycle of planning is often what holds us back from achieving our goals. In today’s episode, Dr. Priyanka Venugopal joins me to discuss why plans alone don’t deliver the desired results and how embracing a different, more informed strategy can lead to greater clarity, growth, and success. Here’s what we cover:

Why just having a plan on paper is never going to create lasting results because we have to go the extra step to evaluate what actually works
How planning triggers the reward centers of the brain because you are imagining doing the plan perfectly, but this often leads to inaction instead of achievement
We know we can do hard things, but a plan shifts our focus to wishfulness instead of doing the work
How to speak to yourself with compassion so your evaluation doesn't feel like self-punishment
5 questions to help you uncover the reason your plan didn’t work and how to adjust moving forward
It’s possible to allow yourself to feel your emotions while also being curious and realistic
Why it’s important to acknowledge your efforts every step of the way - not just when you get a result

I can't wait for you to listen!

Priyanka Venugopal is an Ob/Gyn physician turned Stress and Weight Loss Coach for professional moms who identify as overachievers and who want to lose weight with science backed strategies that will last a lifetime. For over 10 years she has talked with thousands of high achieving professional women and gotten to the root of the high achiever's biggest obstacles in hitting goals at work and on the scale.

Find Priyanka here:

https://www.burnstressloseweight.com/

https://www.instagram.com/burnstressloseweight/

https://www.burnstressloseweight.com/blog

If you are looking for a podcast episode about body image, listen to my interview with Corinne Crabtree: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1984814/episodes/12877354

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 12/11/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 12/11/24

Episode 92 - Grief Around the Holidays with Susie Ruth

The hopes and expectations we have going into the holiday season make this time of year particularly susceptible to feeling grief. In this week's conversation with Susie Ruth, an end-of-life coach and grief specialist, we discuss strategies for navigating grief and offer insights on how best to support someone grieving during the holidays. Here’s what we cover:

The reason why we are more susceptible to feeling grief during the holidays
Why the acronym B.R.A.T.S. will help you remember phrases and actions that DO NOT help you process your grief
The process of learning more about grief is the first step to understanding how you can grieve and live at the same time
How simply acknowledging your grief and that it’s okay to feel is an important healing practice
How to use the W.A.I.T. acronym to guide you in supporting someone who is grieving
Why there is grief that comes with any transition in life

I can't wait for you to listen.

Find Susie here:

https://www.susieruth.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thegrieftender/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thegrieftender

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 12/4/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 12/4/24

Episode 91 - Good Girls, Glinda and Upholding the Patriarchy

When we cause harm to someone else, the good girl tendency is to feel shame and defensiveness. Instead, if we get to a place where we are generous and can grieve our mistakes, we can move on to be better versions of ourselves. In this episode, I talk about how the themes of Wicked relate to my journey of becoming an ex-good girl and the importance of self-compassion when you have to question your beliefs. Here’s what I cover:

How the representation of power structures fueled by patriarchy in the Wicked movie relate to our society
Why you can't grow into better versions of yourself without acknowledging that past versions made mistakes
How my experience as a member of the Mormon church has similarities to Glinda’s character arc in Wicked
Two good-girl beliefs that are roadblocks to learning from our mistakes and becoming better friends and allies
How we have been conditioned to react to shame and think negatively about changing our mind
Why we often jump to defend our beliefs instead of being open to the idea of exploring new ones

I can't wait for you to listen!

Read the Substack essay mentioned in the episode: Defying Gravity: Wicked and the Weight of Social Justice

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 11/27/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 11/27/24

Episode 90 - Why I Love Wicked and You Should Too

In this episode, you’ll get a glimpse into my musical-loving heart as I discuss the feminist themes of the movie, Wicked, and moments in the film that took me back to a time when I had to realize a hard truth. Here’s what I cover:

Why we all deserve to have beliefs consistent with having autonomy and being able to find what we like and what we want to do
How the song “Defying Gravity” helped me through a challenging time in my life
Why the realization that something that provides goodness and safety is actually doing us harm is a shared experience for many
Each of us is worthy of being in relationships, friendships, and careers that do not exist inside circumstances that require us to ignore part of what is going on in order to be happy
An important truth about people pleasing and gender equality is illuminated in an essay by Celeste Davis

I can't wait for you to listen.

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 11/20/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 11/20/24

Episode 89 - Things that Matter Most Right Now

It’s normal to want to bypass feelings of fear, worry, and sorrow during this uncertain time, but we miss the opportunity to create a vulnerable, trusting relationship with ourselves and our feelings if we send these big emotions into exile. In this episode, I discuss how moving forward starts with processing our emotions. Here’s what I cover:

Why distraction from difficult emotions is not a bad thing when it’s balanced with emotional connection to yourself
A visualization exercise to help you process your feelings in a way that builds deep emotional trust
Taking the time to be with your emotions will help create the sense of safety and security needed to move forward in a way that feels good to you
How I processed the uncertainty I feel with understanding and care for myself
Why cultivating vulnerable trust with yourself is one of the most important things you can be doing

I can’t wait for you to listen.

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 11/13/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 11/13/24

Episode 88 - How To Have More Holiday Magic this Season

With the holiday season fast approaching, it’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of parties, errands, cooking, and cleaning that keep us busy. In this episode, we’ll look at how these people-pleasing behaviors can leave us feeling disconnected from the meaningful connections we seek most during this season.

Here’s what I cover:

Why connection is the true magic of the holiday season
The unintended consequences of trying to feel connection through people-pleasing
How to develop a framework to go through this holiday season in a better than last year
Why focusing on self-connection during the holidays will help you feel content when they’re over instead of sad and tired
Three steps to help you tune into your emotions and connect with yourself

I can't wait for you to listen.

Sign up for Stop People Pleasing: Holiday Edition. It's a series of three workshops beginning Thursday, November 14th where we'll dive into the skills that you need so that this season is magical for you, too.

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.datebrazen.com/

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Sara Bybee Fisk 11/6/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 11/6/24

Episode 87 - Settle-Proof Your Dating and Relationships with Lily Womble

Do you feel trapped by the “rules” of modern dating? I’m thrilled to be joined by dating coach Lily Womble in today's episode to talk about how to break free from those dumb dating rules. I want each one of you to find the relationship you’re meant to be in, and that starts with making sure you never have to settle in your dating life ever again.

Here’s what we cover:

How Lily Womble created a dating solution so she'd never have to settle again
Feeling free in your dating life starts with shedding your people-pleasing tendencies
The way we show up in our dating life is influenced by what we were taught growing up
Several “dumb dating rules” and how to break them so you can find the right relationship
Why getting specific about your preferences will help you seek the right partner

Lily Womble is sparking a feminist revolution in the way we date and find love. She was one of the top matchmakers in the U.S., but after setting up hundreds of dates, Lily realized that the answer to finding love was much deeper than a setup, and that the way we are taught to date is still stuck in the patriarchal dark ages. She founded her company, Date Brazen, in 2018 and has since helped hundreds of women create love lives that are epic, settle-proof, and joyful-as-hell with her intersectional feminist approach.

She changes lives daily on TikTok, Top 4 Relationship Podcast- The Date Brazen Podcast, and sold-out coaching programs world-wide. Her book, Thank You, More Please: A feminist guide to breaking dumb dating rules and finding love, is changing lives around the world, published by Legacy Lit. She lives in Brooklyn with her husband, Chris.

I can’t wait for you to listen.

Find Lily here:

https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/

https://www.datebrazen.com/book

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://ladypartsdoctor.com/

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Sara Bybee Fisk 10/30/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 10/30/24

Episode 86 - Bodily Autonomy with Dr. Stephanie Hack, the Lady Parts Doctor

So many of us women have not been properly educated about our bodies and how to know what is best for them. Today, I’m joined by Dr. Stephanie Hack to discuss how we can empower ourselves to advocate for what we want and need.

Here's what we cover:

Hygiene advice for women that reflects love and care for ourselves and rejects the shame we are taught to feel
How certain programming targets the shame women feel surrounding our bodies to sell to us
General female anatomy and how using the anatomically correct terms helps normalize them
Why women need to know our bodies so we can speak up about the care we want and deserve to receive
The more conversations we have about perimenopause and menopause, the more women can learn about what our bodies go through during that time
How YOU are the one who should ultimately decide how to take care of YOUR body

Stephanie Hack, MD, MPH, is a board-certified ob/gyn, podcast host, speaker, and founder of a women's health educational platform. Her special interests in health education and women's health empowerment have led to a career spanning two decades.

It’s important to remember that you’re not alone, and we can support each other as we continue to learn about women's health. I can't wait for you to listen.

Watch the PBS documentary The M Factor: Shredding the Silence on Menopause here.

Find more information about the Stillborn and Infant Loss Support (SAILS) Gala here.

Watch Dr. Stephanie Hack's TEDx talk here.

Find Stephanie here:

https://www.instagram.com/ladypartsdoc/

https://ladypartsdoctor.com/podcasts

https://ladypartsdoctor.com/meditations

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 10/23/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 10/23/24

Episode 85 - Why Feminism Still Matters

On my recent trip to Bolivia, I had an interaction that reignited my thoughts on feminism. In this episode, I explore why feminism remains a vital lens for understanding our world and shaping our actions. Here's what I cover:

How my journey with feminism started with negative perceptions because of my upbringing in the Mormon Church
Why feminism is important for EVERYONE, not just women
How We Should All Be Feminists by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie opened my eyes to the broader implications of gender equality
The story of when I spoke up to advocate for women during my trip
Why we still have work to do when it comes to feminism being inclusive

I can't wait for you to listen!

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.serenahicks.com/

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Sara Bybee Fisk 10/16/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 10/16/24

Episode 84 - Belonging to Myself with Serena Hicks

Get ready for a deep and inspiring conversation with Serena Hicks, a trailblazing business coach who’s shaking up how we view success and belonging. In this episode, Serena and I explore finding self-acceptance and navigating life when you feel pulled between different worlds.

Serena Hicks is a business coach driven by freedom—financial, personal, and spiritual. With a background that includes MTV News and an Emmy from The Tyra Banks Show, she blends corporate success with deep personal insight. Serena champions inclusivity and empowers others to thrive on their terms. Through her coaching philosophy, #LoveTrustMoney, she helps clients align business with values, transforming success into an act of love.

We dive into the power of self-acceptance and explore what it means to truly belong to ourselves, especially when our identities span multiple worlds. Serena brings her unique perspective as a biracial woman and successful entrepreneur to our conversation, sharing how she's dismantling old systems and creating new paths for herself and her clients.

If you’ve ever struggled with external pressures, or you’re looking to align your life with your true values, this episode is for you. Join us and discover how to break free from societal expectations, reclaim your inner freedom, and build a life that reflects your most authentic self. I can’t wait for you to listen.

I can’t wait for you to listen.

Find Serena here:

https://www.instagram.com/xoxoserenahicks/

https://www.facebook.com/SerenaHicksAF/

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 10/9/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 10/9/24

Episode 83 - The Drama Triangle with Andrea Parks

Have you ever felt stuck in the same patterns in your relationships, unsure how to break free? In this episode, I sit down with Andrea Parks, a therapist who dives deep into the hidden dynamics that hold us back. Andrea shares how we can shift out of these roles and start truly healing and reclaiming our power. Tune in as we explore how these patterns can keep us stuck and how, through her unique perspective, Andrea helps guide people toward healing and empowerment.

Andrea is a therapist and facilitator who specializes in trauma, codependency, and life transitions. She owns Bloom Healing, where she creates spaces for individuals to come together, heal, and reconnect with their authentic selves. With a background in counseling psychology, somatic bodywork, and developmental trauma, Andrea brings a wealth of experience to her practice and a deep commitment to fostering growth.

Through her work, Andrea helps people break free from the roles they’ve taken on in relationships and empowers them to live more fulfilled, connected lives. Her passion is to create communities where healing is possible, allowing people to find their voice and power in a supportive environment.

Find Andrea Parks here:

Bloomhealingaz.com

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.facebook.com/karagaisiecoaching

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Sara Bybee Fisk 10/2/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 10/2/24

Episode 82 - We are Smart Enough to Invest with Kara Gaisie

This week, I’m excited to dive into a conversation that challenges traditional norms around money and investing. My guest, Kara Gaisie, is here to help us break free from outdated beliefs that have kept women from fully stepping into their financial power.

Kara Gaisie is a wife, mom, and master-certified financial coach who helps women entrepreneurs break free from the cycle of overworking to reach financial independence. After spending over 15 years as a CPA in Corporate America, Kara launched her coaching business in 2019, focusing on achieving financial freedom without compromising her lifestyle.

In this episode, Kara shares her wealth of experience as both a CPA and life coach, guiding us through her journey of investing and building wealth. She shows us that financial independence is within our reach, empowering us to take control of our finances and create a life of freedom.

Join us for this empowering conversation and discover how to start growing your wealth, take charge of your financial destiny, and rewrite the story you’ve been told about money. I can’t wait for you to listen!

Find Kara here:

https://karagaisie.com/

https://www.instagram.com/karagaisiecoaching/

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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Sara Bybee Fisk 9/25/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 9/25/24

Episode 81 - Stop Apologizing

What have you been apologizing for lately?

I’ve realized I’ve been apologizing for everything, and in most cases, none of my actions have warranted an apology.

Tune in this week to slow down and take a moment to examine the things you apologize for. Do they all actually warrant an apology, or has your “good-girl” programming been taking over? Join me as I share my two hard and fast rules for when to apologize and learn how to get yourself out of auto-pilot to a place where you can honor your needs unapologetically. I can’t wait for you to listen.

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.heymarvelous.com/

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Sara Bybee Fisk 9/17/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 9/17/24

Episode 80 - When the Internet Mob Comes for You with Sandy Connery and Jeni Barcelos

This week, my guests and I invite you to join a conversation we’ve been having over the last few years about women in business and the power of using, or not using, our voices in the face of cancel culture and online scrutiny.

I’m thrilled to welcome Sandy Connery and Jeni Barcelos, friends, business owners, and co-founders of Marvelous Software. Sandy and Jeni, with their courage and resilience, share their experience facing the internet mob in 2020, how they navigated the situation while keeping their business afloat, and what they wish they could have done differently.

As we delve into this timely topic, we’ll explore how to show up thoughtfully online and engage constructively with one another, even amidst social unrest and differing opinions.

We might stir up some controversy, but we believe that sometimes, embracing your authentic self is worth a bit of trouble. I can’t wait for you to listen!

Find Jeni and Sandy here:

https://www.instagram.com/heymarvelous/

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

Join the Free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community

Sara Bybee Fisk 9/10/24 Sara Bybee Fisk 9/10/24

Episode 79 - I Wanted Something Just for Me

I am so excited to share my story with you of how I and three of my travel companions and friends came to found Yapay Bolivia, a nonprofit organization dedicated to alleviating poverty through sustainable healthcare solutions.

This isn’t your average story–it’s a tale of thrilling and sometimes frightening medical events, the kindness shown to me by some of the most inspiring and wonderful women I’ve ever met, and the profound transformation I underwent. It's a story of compassion for the previous version of myself that made all of this possible.

I am incredibly proud of Yapay Bolivia's work and truly grateful that it’s a part of my life. The work I engage in through this organization exists outside of my roles as a mother, wife, and professional—it’s something just for me. I would love for every woman out there to have something like this, whether that means founding a nonprofit or taking small steps toward anything that brings joy and impact to her life. Even the smallest beginnings can lead to significant, positive ripple effects. My journey of wanting something just for me has turned into a meaningful organization that makes a tangible impact on the lives of women and children in Bolivia. I hope it inspires you to pursue something you genuinely want to do, and I can’t wait for you to listen.

PS. If you’d like to donate to Yapay Bolivia, an organization where 100% of donations go directly to impactful projects, your support can help us expand our programs to reach a larger community. Please check out https://yapaybolivia.org/ to learn more and make a difference.

Find Sara here:

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations