You are wasting your life people pleasing.
And it’s time to stop.
People pleasing costs you thousands of hours each year.
How do I know?
Because for years I spent countless hours…
Worrying about what other people thought about me
Pretending to be the “strong” one who could do everything without help.
Afraid to make choices that I knew would upset other people
Upset that I had so much work to do all the time and my efforts went unnoticed and unappreciated
Avoiding having conversations about “difficult things” because I couldn’t be honest about how I really felt and I was afraid to make someone else mad at me
Feeling alone and anxious and resentful as hell.
And I thought it was my fault.
So the voice in my head would start in on me…
“What is the matter with you?”
“Why are you like this?”
“You’re a grown-ass woman, why can’t you stand up for what you want?”
I was tired, and stressed, but mostly I was terrified that it was never going to be any different.
I wanna tell you—it’s not your fault.
We are ALL trained to be people pleasers.
That’s right—every single one of us.
From a young age, people pleasing is how we get our basic needs met.
It’s how we get connection and safety.
People pleasing is so deeply ingrained that you may not even realize you’re doing it anymore.
And let’s be honest: this default setting of people pleasing isn’t working.
It traps you in a cycle of feeling stuck and powerless and costs so much time and energy.
But here's the good news: you can learn to STOP people pleasing.
People pleasing is why you say “yes” to things you don’t actually want to do.
It’s why you endlessly worry and obsess over what others think of you.
It’s why you feel like things happen to you rather than like you’re in control of your life. (How did I get on this extra work committee again??)
It’s why you hold on to relationships where you’re doing most of the giving and simply “hoping” that things will change. (Spoiler: they don’t.)
It’s why you feel like you must rescue others from the consequences of their actions, only to find yourself rescuing on the regular.
It’s why you always look for others to tell you you are worthy or doing a good job. (Hello, external validation!)
It’s a major part of why you feel so tired and stuck, like there isn’t room in your life for YOU.
I’ve been there.
Exhausted and anxious. Consumed by worries that I was never “doing enough” or “doing it right.” Resentful. Disconnected from my body. Afraid of my emotions.
I was stuck in people pleasing because no one had ever taught me the skills to have honest conversations and honest conflict.
I figured it out, and I would love to teach you!
Picture yourself…
>> Speaking up with confidence
>> Sharing your needs and wants
>> Taking new risks rooted in self-love
>> Lovingly ending relationships that aren’t working
>> Starting new ones with boundaries and boldness
>> Disappointing people when that is best for you
>> Having hard conversations without dread
>> Feeling like there is room for YOU in your life
